happy go lucky wedding


Newly Engaged Do’s and Don’ts
January 7, 2010, 9:37 pm
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I’ve noticed on the boards that there are quite a few newly engaged girls.  Congrats to you all!!  It got me thinking about how I felt when I was engaged and all the excitement that goes along with that newly acquired status.  It was awesome.  I seriously could not stop grinning!  Along with all that excitement comes a lot of inspiration, ideas and panic about how to make this whole wedding thing come together.   I thought this might be the perfect time to share some do’s and don’ts for the newly engaged girl.  Hopefully you can learn from my mistakes and triumphs.

Do’s:

  • Take your time to research vendors.  There are so many great vendors out there, it’s going to take a little time to weed through them, their prices, and contracts to zero in on the perfect one for you.  You’re spending lots of money, you deserve to know that you’re getting the best thing out there for your money!
  • Set a budget early.  It will help you determine how many people you can invite, where you can hold this shindig, and basically outline the structure for the entire wedding. 
  • Start gathering inspiration from everywhere.  There are so many amazing blogs and magazines out there.  You are never without inspiration!  Save anything that speaks to you because it will help you get a better grasp on what ideas you want to carry forward.  As you find new, better ideas, get rid of the old stuff that you don’t need anymore.
  • Enjoy being engaged!  It’s so fun.  Everyone is so happy for you.  You’re a bride for that entire time and you do get special treatment.  Relish it! 
  • Create a binder to hold all the important documents and inspiration.  I used my binder A LOT in the beginning.  Maybe not so much now, but it still has all my contracts, and if I ever need to pull one out, I know exactly where it is. 
  • Use friendors.  Unfortunately, I don’t have any.  But if you have talented friends and you feel comfortable entering into a “business” relationship, go for it.  No one will care more about your needs and wants on your wedding day than friends or family. 
  • Take a minute to reflect on the reason behind the wedding.  A lot of times I felt overwhelmed or stressed out, and then once I realized that no matter what happens the day of (if my cake isn’t perfect, or the flowers aren’t the right shade of cream, etc) I will still be married to the love of my life, and that’s pretty comforting.

Don’ts:

  • Book any vendors too early.  I know, you’re panicked that all the good people will be taken, so you rush out and start lining up vendors left and right.  You might have to fire a vendor later on, or worse, you might end up using someone you didn’t really want because you didn’t know what else was out there. 
  • Buy anything on a whim because it’s a good deal (dress, favors, invitations, DIY project materials, ANYTHING).  If you don’t know for sure you’re going to use it, it’s not a good deal regardless of the cost.  Wait to make any purchases until you have a clear vision for your day. 
  • Send out save the dates too early.  My guest list hasn’t fluctuated too much, but there have been some changes.  I would hate to send out a save the date to someone who I maybe didn’t really want to invite later (obviously I would still invite this person later on if I already sent them a save the date). 
  • Ask people to be in your wedding party too early.  I know, I know.  She’s your best friend!  You love her!  You’ll never stop being friends!  Unfortunately, you might.  Or you might decide that you don’t even want a wedding party at all, and then you have to tell all your sweet friends that they are no longer in your wedding.  That makes them sad pandas.  Don’t do that to them.
  • Be unrealistic about what you can accomplish on your own.  It’s ok if you’re not like Martha.  I’m not, and I realized early on that tons of DIY projects were just not in the cards for me.  I learned about Etsy and I bought lots of stuff.  Done and done. 
  • Be afraid to ask for help.   See that Do up there about being a bride?  You do get special treatment, and people will help you, so just make sure to ask, or take people up on their offers when they say they want to help. 
  • Go all bridezilla on people because they didn’t act just like you wanted them to if you never told them what you wanted/needed from them.  Let people off the hook every once in a while.  That’s not to say if you have someone who is acting like a bad friend that they shouldn’t be called out, but give them the benefit of the doubt and communicate with them.  It could make a huge difference. 

So what tips or suggestions do you all have for a newly engaged girl?

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